Anger is something we are hearing a lot more about these days (and likely witnessing, too), and most of us are feeling more anger than we used to. Whether we are directly angry with something or someone in particular, or just feeling the energy of it from sources around us, anger is in the air.
What would it be like to take a “vacation” from feelings of anger? As a coach, I am all for (100%) feeling all of your feelings and not denying the important messages they are trying to tell us. I am advocating here for a short break from letting yourself get immersed in feelings of anger. Just give yourself a vacation. How, you wonder, is that possible?
- Notice the sources of your anger– make a list including anything that annoys you, angers you, causes resentment- get a whole list going.
- Take the list and really looking at it decide which you can altogether avoid, limit, delegate, decide to consciously stop and work on the situation.
- Set a time frame for “taking a vacation” from your angry feelings, residue, radiation, etc. We can’t stop the feelings from coming- recognize them and then use a little mantra to release it while you are taking your break. I like to use (to myself) “Remember, I am not participating in that right now.” This could be for a day, a week, a month….. you decide. The idea is to short circuit living in feelings of anger and rumination which is very unproductive and unhealthy, too.
- Whenever you feel feelings of anger of any shade during the course of your “vacation” consider writing down what is getting to you. Just write it down on a list and then put the list away. Once your “vacation” is over, you can take the list out to see what you can learn from it. At this point you can decide what you want- more vacation? A new strategy?
Feeling angry can become a habit. Our antenna is up and just like we see more to be grateful for when we practice gratitude, when we are angry at any level consistently, we will be tuned to seeing things to be angry about at every turn.
Anger is not the enemy. Our use of it is what makes it challenging. Taking a break and stepping away from it is a reset that can help you get back into balance. Anger has good information to share with you. Creating a new relationship with it can be very enlightening and powerful.
If anger has been trying to get your attention, what is it trying to tell you? What is true about your anger and what might be coming from habit? Habitual ways of thinking, mindsets and old beliefs are worth checking into if you are interested in working through anger and morphing it into something productive.
Remember, you have every right to feel angry about what you do, notice it and ask “how is this serving me?” Make a conscious choice. Taking a break can help you to return with a fresh outlook and maybe more capacity to handle things in a new way.