The financial area of life can be a tricky one for many? I have been through many ups and downs over the course of my life. One thing I did, no matter the shame or disappointment in myself, blame or resentment- no matter all of those things, I always held a vision that things could be better. And the optimism that things WOULD be better.
First I learned to employ gratitude. When I had debt, gratitude for what the debt had provided me with. When I had lack of funds, gratitude for what I did have. And when I was actually stable financially, gratitude for worthiness and being okay with being stable.
Because yes, you can learn to live in a state that keeps you living on the edge. What is life like without the panic and worry? I had many mindsets to overcome- especially what I was taught about people with money- what they are like, what kind of people they are (hint: it wasn’t positive) and what “they” thought about people like me (people without an abundance of money) which wasn’t much. These beliefs were taught to me by someone with their own insecurities and beliefs learned from still others before them.
Learning to rise above it all and find my own positive relationship with money has been a challenge. Learning not to say what you don’t want to be true was one of the best first lessons I learned. All of the things I had been taught were not true. These beliefs show up in the category of things that were once true for me, but seeing that there was no benefit to these beliefs, as well as recognizing that they were not beliefs, but someone else’s passed down to me have been profound.
What are your beliefs about money? Who taught you? How have the beliefs served you? What beliefs are important to hang on to and which are due to be let go of?
I was also taught things like wishing to hope to win the lottery and to hope that somehow magically your ship will come in. Someone is coming to reward you. Magical thinking.
Thankfully I was impatient and not into waiting for that magical day and figured out that working hard and focusing could point me in the right direction. I learned about discipline and setting goals as a part of this. I learned, finally, to stop comparing and to live within means.
I was taught by people along the way that being satisfied with how things are is settling- and what a bad word that was. But actually being stable financially- having financial well being or working a plan to get there is freedom. There is no replacement for that feeling.
We all have a path our lives have taken in this area (and all others.) Chances are you may have some forgiving to do and some resentments to let go of. Don’t forget that this is also toward yourself.
If you have ever struggled financially and are now okay- take time to reflect on how you became okay and give thanks to all that transpired. If you have never struggled financially- give thanks and make sure you cultivate some compassion and understanding for those who have not been/are not in your shoes.
Where are you in this area on a scale from 1-10?
If not a 10 what would make it a 10?
What are the first 5 steps you can take to start moving in the direction of the 10? When will you take the first step? Put it into your calendar. Make an actual plan- in writing.
Who can help you? Who can hold you accountable?
What books will you read or training will you take to learn more?
Take some time to think about this. This area is not one that most people want to delve into- it can be very uncomfortable, so be nice to yourself in the process.